Kellbell Squarepants

Politics and the Feeling Mind

I do not have a political mind.  I do not like politics and I certainly do not like the election season.  It seems to bring out the worst in people as do most uneducated discussions about politics or religion.  "Let's focus on the issues here."  Let's be honest, no one ever focusses on the issues.  This is a political season of anger, demands for change, and the need to feel like we matter to a candidate this time around.  Most people just want Bush out of office.

I used to be satisfied to think that any of the three currently running candidates would make okay presidents.  Even McCain isn't that bad.  I was proud that we are FINALLY seeing minorities represented in a presidential election and then embarrassed by the types of campaigns being waged. 

My family supports Obama, but as a woman I always felt that if Hillary won, I could be okay with that.  Lately I'm finding myself more and more pushed away from her.. well.. more that I'm pushing HER away I suppose.  Women I admire support her, but she does not give me that sense of hopefullness, nor does she give me the feelings that she can make the changes we need to recover from the last eight years.

I know that a candidate should be more than just about how you "feel" about them, but I don't discredit my feelings.  I need to feel encouraged, I need to feel that faith in my candidate.  I just don't have that for Hillary.  I'm not sure I ever did.  I won't go so far to say that I couldn't bring myself to vote for her, but it will be with great reluctance that I do so if that is my only choice.

Patio Redeux

This weekend while C is jaunting about with youth from church at a Youth Quake event, I will be here at home working on a surprise for him.  Last weekend we were at Lowe's looking at patio furniture.  We decided on some black wrought iron items (because the dog can't chew them like he did our last patio set).  For Christmas C gave me a gift card so that I might get a freezer or a vacuum cleaner, but I have decided that I want to makeover the patio.  My budget is limited, but I still have a good amount to spend.  The table was only $60 and the chairs were $25 each.  I will also be getting a new umbrella as our last one broke in a storm.  I would also like to get some plant stands, a large reed mat to go under the table and chairs, and a storage chest to put our other chairs in that can take damage from the weather.   I will also be getting some chair cushions for the wrough iron chairs.  I hope to have all this done before C and A come home from the youth event.  I've called a friend about helping me with his truck as C is taking my vehicle to the youth event.   This means I'm stuck driving his car for the weekend.  No biggie.

Speaking of the youth event, I got a call last night from the youth pastor.  She wants MEEEEE to do the kid's sermon on Sunday.  ACK!!!  I'm terrified.  I suppose it's not THAT difficult, but I just feel weird about it.  C told me I should have just said no, but I couldn't do that.  Especially after the conference I just went to about younger members not being interested in church leadership and I said "that's not true."  ughhhh  LOL  I'm sure it will be fine.  Hopefully they give me the verse before Sunday so I can cheat and use the internet to find something appropriate to say about it.

Well, baby girl is up much to early for my plans, so once again I am foiled!  :) 

My cats are trying to kill me... and other tales of wonder

Typically our cats are not at all affectionate.  They hide most of the time and don't really want anything to do with us humans here in the house.  That is until I'm carrying a baby around, or heavy trays of food, or stacked dishes, or stepping out of the shower, or trying to pee, etc.  You get the idea.  Because when those things are going on, the cats are at your feet, rubbing your legs, talking to you, crying for love, or food, or water, or whatever.  Because they know that suddenly you're busy.  Suddenly it's not possible for you to give them affection, so they must incite affection.  Little Bit tripped me 5 times in about as many minutes.  Without my glasses or contacts I'm legally blind.  It finally took me tripping, regaining my balance only to have her trip me again and this time regain my balance by stepping on her tail that she finally got the message.  She hissed at me, took off running, and I haven't seen her since. 

I have been trying to register for summer school all morning.  Unfortunately none of the classes I am interested in are available to me because they are graduate courses :(  One looks really interesting... Feminism and Religion.  Doesn't that sound great?  LOL  I'm going to try to petition the instructor to see if he'll let me in.  I am planning on attending graduate school after I finish in December, so who knows.  He may need some students to fill the class, you never know :)

Reflections of Lonliness

I spent most of yesterday at a conference with my pastor.  The conference is how to transform your church for the "today" crowd.  It was very strange and while it used a lot of sociological theories, the people leading the course knew nothing about sociology and therefore their interpretations of the course were a little "off."  For example, they called people over the age of 40 "immigrants" because we are "outside the current culture."  Now I don't know about you, but I'm 40 and I feel very much like a native.  Of course I'm in college and surrounded by the culture, so perhaps I'm an exception.  Then the guy went on to say that our culture, our society is losing its fringe.  That there are no longer defineable margins.  I looked at my pastor, he looked at me, and we both said at the same time "Tell that to the people being marginalized."  LOL  Basically society is two groups:  the Have's and the Have Nots.  The church should consider itself more to be native in my opinion, because they see themselves as having something that the people want (or should want).  Immigrants, to some degree, work to save their own culture from assimilation.  They want to carry on their own culture.  Just because they are going to a "new world" they don't want to totally forget everything about their own culture.  That's how I see young people. (OMG did I just refer to the younger generation as young people....I must be officially old)

ANYway, we ended up leaving early because they took FOREVER to get into the conference.  The morning was spent introducing the two speakers.  They took the entire morning to tell us about their lives, where they grew up, how they came to their calling, etc.  It was interesting, but we were there to learn how to get people fired up at our church, not to be lulled to sleep with personal stories of faith.  The conference portion didn't begin until after lunch and becuase of the reasons in the first paragraph, Craig (my pastor) and I were a bit skeptical about the whole thing.  We ended up leaving early because of the lack of "meat" to the program.  We're headed back there again today with another church member.  Maybe today will be better and we'll get to the "meat."

Had very good conversations with Craig on the way to the conference and home.  We talked about books, sociology, social work, life, love, and lonliness.  Craig had given me a book for my birthday called Silence by Shusaku Endo.  The book is about Christian persecution in Japan during the age of the Samuri.  In the book one of the priest talks about how being a priest is lonely and I was struck about how those of the faith are constantly surrounded by people, yet who do the religious community have to go to but each other?  It was a bit sad and got me thinking more about Craig.  I'll have to write more about this later as it's time for me to head to the conference.